Helping Kids Feel Comfortable Meeting Their Therapist
By Jen Rapanos, LMSW

Meeting someone new can sometimes make us feel a little nervous—that’s completely normal! It’s helpful to name and talk about these feelings with kids so they know it’s okay to feel this way.
There are a few things parents or guardians can do to support their child before the first session:
  • Talk About Your Intention for Therapy: Share why you’re bringing a therapist into your family’s circle of support. You might say, “A therapist is someone whose job is to help kids (and grown-ups) with things that feel hard sometimes.” Use whatever term feels comfortable—therapist, counselor, helper—the key is to frame it in a positive, proactive way. Highlight that therapy is about learning new skills and finding support, not about “fixing a problem.” Making this relatable can help your child feel understood and avoid feelings of shame.
  • Identify an Area for Support: Help your child understand their specific struggle or challenge in a way that feels relatable. For example, “Sometimes it feels hard to calm down when you’re upset, so we’re working with someone who can teach us ways to handle big feelings.” Focus on strengths and goals rather than problems.
  • Provide Context About Therapy: For children who naturally feel anxious about starting something new, providing a little context can go a long way. Take a look at the Well-Bean website together and talk about what the space looks like (we have photos on the website!). You can also talk to your Well-Bean therapist about scheduling a short meet-and-greet in person or virtually if you think it would help your child feel more comfortable.
  • Discuss Concerns with Your Therapist: If you anticipate your child having difficulty transitioning into the session, talk with your Well-Bean therapist ahead of time. Giving kids agency around whether a parent will join the first (or future) session is important too. Feeling safe takes precedence, so we’ll let the child lead and make adjustments based on what helps them feel most comfortable.

Giving Kids a Chance to Ask Questions
Empowering kids to ask their own questions during the first session can help them feel more comfortable and involved. Providing a list of questions in advance gives them time to explore their thoughts with a parent or trusted adult, which can make the experience less intimidating. Below are some ideas for questions, grouped into categories, to help kids get started!

Questions About Therapy (What Happens Here?)
  1. What do we usually do in therapy sessions?
  2. Can I bring something to show you, like a drawing or a toy?
  3. Will we mostly talk, or will we do activities too?
  4. Can I tell you if I don’t like something we’re doing?
  5. How long does a session usually last?

Questions About How You Can Help Me
  1. Can you help me understand my feelings better?
  2. What should I do when I feel really mad or upset?
  3. Can we talk about what’s been happening at school or at home?
  4. Do you have ideas for when I feel worried or scared?
  5. Will you teach me ways to handle things that feel hard?

Fun “Get to Know You” Questions
  1. What’s your favorite color or animal?
  2. Do you have any pets?
  3. What do you like to do when you’re not working?
  4. Have you always wanted to be a therapist?
  5. What’s your favorite kind of snack?

Random and Silly Questions
  1. If you could have any superpower, what would it be?
  2. Do you like pizza or tacos better?
  3. What’s the silliest thing you’ve ever seen?
  4. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go?
  5. Do you know any funny jokes?

Some Things To Keep In Mind: 
Remind kids that therapy is a safe space where they can be themselves, but also honor that it might take some time to feel comfortable. Trying something new takes both courage and patience, and it’s important to validate their feelings every step of the way. Let them know they have agency—they get to play an active role in shaping how their sessions go.

It’s also helpful for kids to understand that part of the process is finding the right fit. Therapy works best when they feel safe, supported, and able to trust the person helping them. Encourage open communication between the child, parent, and therapist so everyone is working together as a team. Remind them that it’s okay if the process feels like a work in progress—taking that first step is an important part of the journey.

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